Dress Code For Those Over 50

[fly2fish]

Many of us 'Old Folks' (those over 50, WAY over 50, or hovering near 50) are quite confused today about how we should present ourselves. Feeling 'young' , we try to conform to current fashions and present a youthful image.

Contrary to what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided:

1. A nose ring and bifocals

2. Spiked hair and bald spots

3. A pierced tongue and dentures

4. Miniskirts and support hose

5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads

6. Speedos and cellulite

7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar

8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor

9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge

10. Bikinis and liver spots

11. Mini skirts and varicose veins

12. Inline skates and a zimmer

And, Most importantly

AT SOME POINT YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP THE DAISY DUKE SHORTS!

[KCRIVERRAT]

I just threw away half of my cinnamon roll...

[Buzz]

I can't help but think stretch pants should be in there somewhere.