FishinCricket

Pretty much my sentiments exactly...

Have fished the Niangua for my entire adult life and then some...

you must be ashamed of your body.. lol "if your wife only knew".. Where do you think I was planning on getting the bleached pubic hair from? Bwah ha ha wait, you don't think it would work? Now I'm gonna hafta try it just to see..

There's no sure fire way that works. As SIO3 and Wrench pointed out, sometimes a tactic works, sometimes it gets you shot at.. I suggest you go buy a lil book called "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.. There's some really great advice for this type of thing, if you're looking for it. Here's what Dale would most likely suggest: Write them a Letter, make sure it is worded with the following points (in what ever script you are most comfortable with): A sincere compliment about their home, property, etc A plain explanation of why you would be writing them in the first place an offer, something you could potentially do for them A very sincere thank you for reading your letter a non-commital way for them to reply here's an example off the top of my head: Dear Mr and Mrs Jones, Hello, my name is Cricket Staggs, my friend Jim Johnson is a neighbor of yours. I drive past your home frequently and it would be hard to help but notice how nice your property is. You have a very beautiful home, a fantastic plot of land, and even a well trained (and beautiful) golden retriever who knows his boundries and never enters the roadway when I come by. You always keep the yard landscaped and the ditches cleared, which really makes a big difference to folks like Jim who live downhill from you and would suffer all your drainage if it wasn't for your diligence in keeping it cleared. I am writing you today to ask for a favor, and to offer one in return. My friend Jim is disabled and he loves to fish catch and release. He and I notice you have a very nice bass pond. He has a little trouble getting around, but his little scooter could make it up the road and down to your pond. My proposal to you: I would like to offer to come out on a monthly basis and clear the brush from your culvert in exchange for catch and release rights for Jim and I in your pond. If this arrangement won't work but something else will (mowing, leaf burning, etc), We would be glad to hear That as well.. Thank you for taking the time to read this letter, I have enclosed a stamped envelope for your reply. If this arrangement is simply impossible Jim and I will completely understand. If this is the case, feel free to disregard this letter and use the stamped envelope for whatever you like.. Sincerely, Cricket Staggs, 417-718-8666

well if I was a douchebag I would mail you some bleached pubic hair.. lol anything besides white squirrel fur that you can use? Maybe green pocket lint, or tinsel?

So when do I get to join Team Eric? You got a mechanic (and apparently a douchebag?), why not a car salesman? I'd looove to be a product tester...

We (she) has decided that we can't go that route this time.. But soon hopefully. BrownieMan, I think we made the decision to come down that way.. Will see what the morning brings.. Looking forward to meeting this Berry fellow and his fat lil friends..

Thank you sir, I have submitted this to the Boss for consideration.. lol

Well it's down to the eleventh hour, but that don't sound too bad.. How do I contact that fella?

lol, catfishing is probably the only thing I can't talk the wife into.. At least not without a guide. Even then I'd say she prefers to target another species.. Thanks for the suggestion though...

So, the wife had a pretty rough week and is looking to get out of the house. Lily's landing is full tonight otherwise we'd head that way.. We are open to any suggestions that will get her out on a stretch of water where she has a decent chance at catching some fish.. Anything from floating a small stream, fishing for smallies to hiring a guide on one of the big lakes around here hunting bass and whites and such, these are all options we might consider.. What do you suggest?

meh, your prolly right.. I retract my former statement. Owls (and pigs) have buttholes, though I have never personally verified that..

Man, I was with ya (even through the religious stuff) up until now.. Butnow you done gone and picked a fight with my favorite food! How could you? I thought we was friends? side story: My brother is one of your fellow "swine is toxic" activists.. He has become so averse to swine that he gets sick when he smells it cooking. Recently, while camping at a public campground, I had to calm him down when he woke the entire campsite at 4:30am. What was he doing? Giving a poor fella a cussing cause he was cooking bacon for breakfast! The entire campgroud got to hear: "I don't know how you m}*#+{}ers can stand the smell of that swine shiete! Take your f#*%ing swine to the other side of the campground or I swear I will puke all over you!" some people get a bit overzealous, ya see.. lol

meh, butthole talk just ain't the same withoutcha.. And what do you mean again? That last probing visit from the aliens wasn't really a drug test in disguise, was it? (didn't know a probe was required for that?!?)

actually that was late night talk for us.. You should leave the blankey lie sometime and come join us.. But NO thumbsucking.. (had to kick VIP and Solus Vero out for that.. lol) No, Pigs don't.. Matter of fact defacating is a vile and nasty habit and it should be outlawed! MWAH AH AH

That diagram shows a "vent", not an "anus".. I stand by my statement..

Did you know that an owl doesn't have a butthole? Go figure!

I'd say you were subtle enough for mixed company.. Not to mention funny as heck! Had me chuckling anyways... Nice report, thanks.

That sounds really good! Wanna box up a serving and mail it down here? I promise to give you a good review...

It's a question (wager) that has been contemplated since the days of Pascal, and probably before. Religious discussion is bound to get someone hot under the collar (like Wrench's innocent enough correlation above of GOD and Santa Clause, which is bound to offend any fundamentalist Christian or at least get their dander up towards you) naw, if I wanted to discuss this stuff further I would go on over to www.freeratio.org and have at it. Been there, done that.. Even took a few mental photos.. Now, about this fishin stuff.. lol

yes, these are all valid points, from a Christian perspective.. I spent my time in life as a Gnostic Creationist (look it up), but have since moved on. I certainly don't hold it against you for being at a point in the middle of the path.. You mentioned the Rapture, for instance.. An interesting political story in Brittain some 200 years ago is what brought about the theory of a "second coming" (Rapture).. But this forum is for fishing, and most folks on here take their spirituality pretty personal.. So Ill stop. Good luck to all on your path toward enlightnement.. Remember that, in cases such as these, all roads tend to lead to the same eventual destination. May as well enjoy the path.

I can't imagine spending an eternity in suprise.. lol seriously though, if there is a Hell then I have no fear of going there.. If these is a DOG, he and I are tight.. Like peas and carrots. Thanks for your concern though.. Ignosticsm is interesting, glad you looked it up Ness. JJ: glad you got a kick outta that.. I thought it was funny when I first heard it too.. (surely no one thought I came up with that on my own, right? As usual, I stand on the shoulders of genius, with a booger hangin' outta my nose..)

I don't get offended "by the mentioning of God" at all, just like I don't get offended when they kill Santa Claus or Jesus on South Park (the TV show). I am not an atheist, either.. Dunno what gave you that idea. My grandfather is a pastor, I have spend more hours in the Church than I care to recount, and I have read the bible (and many other religious and historical documents) on several occasions. My theology tends to disagree with mainstream Christianity, but I am most certainly capable of "understanding your speech"... What you fail to realize is that, around here, we don't take ANYHTING seriously, except politics (which is banned here) death and taxes. so to sum up: 1. No angry at you at all (even thanked you for the explanation if I recall correctly), just retorting politely with my point of view. 2. Not an atheist (Ignostic, if I had to pidgeon-hole myself like that .. but I prefer not to) 3. Nothing is off limits but Politics, Death, and Taxes. (well, and like children and such.. You know, good hearted teasing) That being said, I don't think demons would be anywhere near Wrench's house, if they knew what was good for them. As I recall, Wrench hasn't sneezed (or blinked, for that matter) in years... lol Now what the heck was this thread about?

Why, I do believe he is talking about an exorcism.. Don't worry, Wrench'll be along soon enough to straighten him out.. lol

Your bottle of bleach came into contact with a minute black hole.. Err something.. Or the devil did it.