Short dramatic shufling fish snagging report

[snagged in outlet 3]

I'll try and keep this as short and concise as possible.

Last night was one of those cloudy, moonless nights with an inky blackness that disorients even the most experienced night-time-shuffle-snagger. The kind of blackness that makes you think somebody moved the daytime landmarks that seemed so familier to you when the sun was shining. "Are the stairs farther down the sidewalk" you think to yourself? Spooky!!! Man I've loved these kind of nights forever.

I am armed with my favorite custom made 3 foot 6 weight with the tichrainium reel that was milled from from the Area 51 crash remnants, retail price 2200 bucks. This new light weight reel material actually floats in air because it's specific gravity is so low. Makes for a great shuffle snagging reel since it doesn't cause muscle fatigue and perfectly balances my 3 foot 6 weight. Man I've loved this rod forever.

I'm wearing my favorite, guaranteed never to leak, stocking foot, spac-aged polymer, double overlayed gortex waders. They just started leaking around the ankle, retail price 800 bucks. Man I've loved these waders forever.

After careful observation of the current situation and calling the Table Rock Dam Power station, I knew to go, to my "go to fly". It's a triple weighted, double dubbed, D-ribbed, prophylactic wrapped antron threaded jig pattern with a tichrainium bead head. It's awesome. It's a 150-200 fish per day pattern at the trout parks and really puts em in the net here on Taney. I call it "The Rusty Griffen Danoinark Gonefishin John Berry Lilley Snagger. It has the ability to withstand the many micro currents present here on Taney. Man I've loved this fly forever.

I not so carefully shuffle out to my favorite spot just above the rebar chute, to the right, as you're looking downstream, of the 3rd outlet but not to far into the chute but just at the top. Once there, the night's blackness is on you like a chicken on a tick. You think to yourself, "will a low-flying blue herron skewer my head like a shish-ka-bob while I'm standing here? Do they know I'm here? Can they see me in this inky blsckness? Will a beaver bite me? Spooky!!! Man I've loved this spot forever.

I like to really kick it up when I first enter the water to get as many of those fish to follow me out to my favorite spot as possible. After settling in I turn on my 5 million candle power, cordless, 12 volt, DC rechareable, quartz halogen eguipped, clip-on spotlight like those guys use to poach deer at night, retail price 89 bucks. You'd think it would scare off the fish but you'd be wrong. They don't care what's going on as long as you keep up the dance routine. Man I've loved that light forever.

The key to this finely honed technigue is to get the point of the hook just below the head of the trout and give it a good snatch. It's not really a bassfishin, head-rippin all out assault but more like a limp-wristed, panty-waisted flick of the rod tip. Just enough to quickly embed the hook in afforementioned trout's head. Kind of like when the nurse gives a toddler a booster shot, quick and painless. Man I've loved this finely honed technigue forever.

The length limit for keepers is under twelve inches and one big fish over twenty inches so I try and get the big fish first and then fill the stringer with dinks. I prefer to snag the big one in the back fin then chase him all over the river until it dies of exhaustion. People must think I'm a great fisherman because when I come off the river in the morning everybody is staring at me and pointing. Man I've loved eating fresh caught trout forever.

I never see many people with fish on their stringer so they must not be using my technigue. It was tough trying to catch fish down there until I started shuffle snagging. I have over two hundredd fillets in my two hundred seperately located freezers. Man I've loved those freezers forever.

Thanks for reading my short but sweet report and I hope it helps some of guys out there. Anyway next time I'm headed down to fish I'll post up here on the forum and maybe we can meet-up for a get-together. Man I've loved those meet-up get-togethers forever.

SIO3

[gonefishin]

Dang snagged I didnt know you had been feeling poorly. At least I guess you been feeling poorly cuz it sure seems the doc has you on some of the really good drugs. ROFL

[The Caddis]

That is so satirical it will unfortunately be lost on those who just don't get it. Man I've loved reading your posts forever!!!

[Terry Beeson]

OH MY GAWD!

But one thing, SIO3.... What freakin' brand of fly line were you using? and your leader/tippet configuration please?

I WANT DETAILS, MAN! DE-TAILS!!!!

(My PERSONAL choice for fly line is the new RIO "HiTech TotalMemoryLapse FlorescentCamo DoubleWeightForwardShooting SilkTitanium SuperSlick TeflonSiliconBaconGrease-Coated/Impregnated" fly line.... Retail price, $275. Man... I've loved that stuff forever.....

[Terrapin Station]

Really good stuff snagged. Reminds me of the prose Paul Dallas would submit after waking up in pile of empty Old Crow bottles, discarded kimonos and a bad case of amnesia.

[twosets]

Hey SIO3

Thanks for the excellent report. I am up here in St. Louis and must therefore do most of my fishing on the computer. It is always good to get an update fresh from the stream.

Let me also say that you have my favorite name on this site. Man, i have loved your name and postings forever.

George

[Aeronikl]

I know what kind of line he uses. I snuck a peek one time when he left the river and the crowd was attacking him. He uses 50 lb. Spider Wire for tippet, and 120 lb. mono for a shock tippet. Never loses a fish. I am suprised he didn't mention the explosives he uses when the snagging is slow. Boy I love when he uses the dynamite. You have to be careful not to get it too close to the material salvaged from Area 51, though. Hey, I'll be back in a few weeks. We can meet up and fish.

[Danoinark]

Gosh Snagged, send that to Snoop Dog...I believe he could turn that into hop!

"The Lament of the Taneycomo Snagger"

[Rusty]

Terry B, You just lost your title.

That has to be the #1 post of the year. Congratulation SIO3. You are now the most dramatic poster to date.

[The Caddis]

The Taneycomo Snagger, what a name, good one Dano