Dad...1926-2014

[Al Agnew]

My dad passed away yesterday. In the end, it was a blessing, because the last few months of his life had not been good. After breaking a hip for the second time back in August, he never recovered, and spent those months in a nursing home, unable to walk, his mind fogged by drugs and continuing infections. It had been a race for a long time to see what would get him first; thanks mainly to smoking since he was 10 years old until he quit about 20 years ago, he suffered from heart disease, horrible lungs, and failing kidneys. But he had remained active up until the broken hip, always cheerful. He often said he had planned to live until he was 70, and if he'd thought he would live as long as he did he would have taken better care of himself.

Dad never finished the 8th grade, but he was one of the smartest men I knew in many ways. A veteran of WWII in the Pacific, he returned from action to become an auto mechanic by profession, and he could fix anything. When he went into business for himself he was always busy because people in the area knew he was the best at what he did, and that he would never overcharge. Perhaps he never really understood me, because there wasn't a mechanical bone in my body and I was always reading and drawing as a kid, but he instilled in me my love of the outdoors, hunting and fishing, and we both loved to read. A college education and an art degree, and a profession as an artist, had to have been foreign to him and my mom, but they always encouraged me and never tried to talk me out of doing what I wanted to do. Though Dad could perhaps relate more to my brother Donnie, who followed in his footsteps and became as good a mechanic, I always knew he was proud of me and my accomplishments.

Perhaps more than anything else, Dad taught me how life should be lived, with honesty and respect for others, with courage and conviction. He expected good behavior, good grades, and respect from my older sister Donna, my younger brother Donnie, and me, but he seldom raised his voice, just calmly letting us know when we didn't meet expectations. Oh, there was a big wooden paddle in the corner, but it was seldom used.

As an adult, I still leaned on Dad for many things, from taking care of my vehicles to furnishing shuttles for float trips. We went on many floats together until he reached a point where he couldn't take sitting in a canoe all day. That was one of the biggest reasons I finally bought a jetboat; Dad could still fish with me. We fished our one friendly annual tournament at Pomme de Terre together for many years, until the rigors of it became too much for him. The picture above is Dad with the biggest smallmouth he ever caught out of my boat, nearly 21 inches. He had fished Big River often before I was born, and taught me a lot about it in the early years, but he had become a reservoir angler by the time I was old enough to fish with him, and we spent almost every Sunday on Wappapello Lake catching big bass, he, Mom, and me, and later my brother, all in a 16 ft. johnboat with a 15 HP Mercury and an old Silvertrol trolling motor.

He also loved fishing by himself, which may be where I got my predilection to fish alone much of the time. After my mom died a few years ago, he often fished alone, and it was when fishing by himself on a local lake that he fell overboard and broke a hip the first time, nearly drowning. We didn't want him fishing by himself after that, but he still did occasionally. Don and I made sure to take him often, and he was always the perfect fishing buddy, never late, never complaining and always so appreciative of being there. I'm going to miss those days on the water with him.

After Mom died, he lived alone until he found a very nice lady. Darlene became his "steady girlfriend", and certainly brightened the last years of his life. He was always happiest when surrounded by his kids and grandkids, going to my brother's house for breakfast on weekends and to our house on holidays or just to stop by when he and Darlene were out driving all over this part of Missouri. I wish he had been able to visit our place in Montana, but long trips had become problematical by the time we acquired it.

He was never a religious man, and the only time he ever darkened the doorstep of a church was to attend our weddings. We never talked much about those things, and I don't really know what he believed, but I'm pretty sure that he simply didn't worry about it, he lived this life as if it was the only one there was, and it was to be lived with honor and compassion and with the goal of making his little part of the world a better place. I think he succeeded.

[laker67]

Your dad is a prime example of our heritage. A well respected citizen in the community, a great father figure, and one of many military veterans who helped to maintain our freedoms we so much enjoy today. Sorry for your loss Al.

[Flysmallie]

Sorry Al, he sounds like he was a great man to know.

[Old plug]

Very Sorry Al.

[Lancer09]

Good stuff.

It sounds like your handling it right, celebrating his life not dwelling on his death.

Stay strong.

[MOsmallies]

Very sorry for your loss Al... I've always enjoyed reading your reports from the trips you and your Dad took together. What a wonderful write-up. You sure have a lot of good memories of your Dad and that is priceless!

[ness]

Sorry to hear that Al. That's a real nice write up on him too. He's really pretty lucky he was still able to get out and do things at an advanced age, and had a couple sons that helped make it happen.

[Smalliebigs]

I'm really sorry to hear that Al, my prayers and good thoughts are coming your way. I have big time respect for all WWII vets, he was a true patriot and a part of the greatest generation in America IMO. Your dad sounded like a pretty cool dude and you're a good example of why we should all at least take our kids fishing and show them what we know about the sport....you never know what it might develop into?? It's really awesome that you were able to have shared such great memories of floating and fishing rivers with your dad......I really admire that.

[mic]

Sorry to here that Al... prayers to you and your's

[Guest]

Sorry for your loss. Losing someone so close is never easy, but reflecting on the great moments that they have given us can help ease the pain.