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I saw a homeless man near Walmart today & I asked him if I gave you $20 would you buy booze?
He said no he hadn't had a beer in years. Then I said if I give you $20 will you buy fishing gear? He again said no, he stopped fishing 5 years ago.
So then I said I'll do you better than $20. I'll take you home and get you all cleaned up. My wife will cook a fantastic meal for you. Then I'll bring you back & still give you $20.
He asked me won't your wife get mad? I said it didn't matter.
I just want her to see what happens to a man when he stops drinking & fishing!
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Most people are shocked when they find out how incompetent I am... As an ElectricianĀ šŸ¤£

There is a new trend in our office with folks giving pet names to their food. I saw it today as I was eating a sandwich named KevinĀ šŸ¤£

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A woman goes into the local newspaper to see that the obituary for her recently deceased husband is published. The editor informed her that there is a $50 charge per word. She pauses, and then says let it say "Bob Smith died." Amused at her thrift the editor tells her that there is a seven word minimum for all obituaries. Again she thinks for a moment and says "In that case, let it say Bob Smith died. Fishing boat for Sale!"šŸ¤£

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