Just funny stuff

[Mitch f]

[Johnsfolly]

[Johnsfolly]

An elderly couple walks into McDonalds. The gentleman orders a hamburger meal. They get their meal and sit down. The man unwraps the hamburger and cuts it in half. He gives one half to his wife and keeps the other half. He picks up the fries and counts them out and evenly splits the fries between himself and his wife. The customers around them notice this process. One customer says to his wife that it must be terrible that they can only afford a single hamburger meal. 

The gentleman begins to eat his part of the burger and his fries. He will take a drink from the soda and then his wife will take a drink from the soda. The woman does not take a bite of any of her food. 

The other customer gets up and comes over to the couple and he offers to buy them another meal. The gentleman refuses saying that what they have is enough for them both and that they share everything. He then takes another bite of his burger while his wife sits without touching her meai. The customer pleads with the couple to buy them another meal. Again the couple refuses and the gentleman states again that they share everything. Finally the customer gives up. He turns to the woman and asks why she has not touched any of her food. The wife responds that they share everything and she is waiting her turn. "Your turn! What are you waiting for?!?" asks the customer. "The Teeth!" 🤣

[Johnsfolly]

I blond man goes to the DOT to find a job. They have an opening for someone to paint the center lines on several rural roads. The man interviews for the painter position. During the interview the supervisor tells tha blond man that he would need to be able to meet the minimum requirement of completing two miles of road per day. The man agrees and gets the job.

On his first day he completes 4 miles of roadway. His supervisor is impressed. The next day he only completes 2 miles. His supervisor is concerned about the drop in productivity but since the man is still at the daily minimum things are OK. The next day the blond man only completes one mile of road. The supervisor calls him in to find out what's going on. He says to the blond man, "You painted 4 miles your first day, then 2 miles the second, and now only 1 mile today." "What's going on with your reduced productivity?"

The blond man replied "Well it's taking longer now to go back and get paint from the bucket." 🤣

[jdmidwest]

I saw that couple the other day in Ste Gen, really. Lots of frugal old Germans around here.

[Quillback]

[Johnsfolly]

[Johnsfolly]

[Quillback]

Gary Larson was hilarious in his prime.

[netboy]