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A woman excitedly awoke on the morning of her birthday. She wakes up her husband and tells him that she had a dream about him giving her a diamond necklace for her birthday and she wonders what that dream meant. The husband gets a sheepish grin and says that she may know this evening. That evening he hands her a small gift and she rapidly tears off the paper in anxious anticipation. She looks down at a small book titled - "How to Interpret your Dreams" 🤣

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2 hours ago, netboy said:

For all you bird hunters...

Missed birds.jpg

Just put my old 10 gauge browning BPS up for sale at Denny Dennis sporting goods on consignment. 

"Honor is a man's gift to himself" Rob Roy McGregor

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I'm pretty sure that this one has been posted somewhere in the 190 previous pages, but I saw it again.

A man finds an old oil lantern. As he is cleaning it out pops a Genie. The genie says that he can have three wishes, but what ever he wishes for his greatest enemy Bob will get double. 

So the mans wishes for a brand new sports car that would be serviced and gassed for free for the life of the car. The genie grants that wish and as agreed Bob received two cars.

The man then wishes for a grand estate with open meadows, clear water streams, and rolling forested hills. Again the genie grants his wish and Bob is granted two such estates.

The genie asks the man what is his third and final wish. The man responds that he wants to be beaten half to death! 😉

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Ok this one may get deleted but I'm  going to post it anyway.

A man is with his son in a coffee shop. His son is fooling around with three pennies. The boy accidently swallows the pennies and begins to choke. He coughs and two of the pennies come free but he is still choking on the third penny. Can anyone help us screams the frightened father. Across the shop a pretty woman wearing a blue suit is reading from her laptop and drinking her coffee. With the commotion she gets up and slowly crosses the room to the boy. She undoes his jeans and starts to squeeze and twist his testicles. As she applies more pressure the boy convulses and coughs out the last penny. She deftly catches it out of the air, releases the boy and goes back to her table still keeping the penny. After the dad helps the boy dress and makes sure that he is OK, he goes over to the woman thanking her for her help. "Where did you learn that technique? Are you a doctor?" "No.", she responds. "I am with the Internal Revenue Service!" 🤣

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