Are you prepared ?

[Terrierman]

37 minutes ago, Johnsfolly said:

That is pretty cool. Must have taken them all day to build. I bet the kids will remember that time that dad helped them build a snow castle😁. Some great memories there. Now if they had a moat with fish that would put it over the top!

Not just any fish.  Sharks.  Or maybe piranhas.

[Quillback]

45 minutes ago, Flysmallie said:

Back when I worked in an auto parts store we had a big snow in Springfield. One of my guys had an Isuzu Trooper that would go anywhere so I had him come pick me up for work. None of the other guys made it in that day and we ended up closing early but hitting the liquor store instead of going home. We were out just having a bit of fun and decided that we would stop by one of the guys house that didn't make it in to give him a hard time. As we got to his house we saw several snowmen in his yard and a little fort. He had been having all kinds of fun while we were at work. We knocked on the door buy nobody would answer. So we trashed his fort and murdered all the snowmen and then threw all out empty beer bottles out in his yard. That will teach him. As we are driving on down the road we get about 3 or 4 houses down and my buddy points at one and says "Wait a minute, isn't that Shannon's house?". He was right. 

That is freaking awesome!

[jdmidwest]

10 hours ago, Flysmallie said:

Back when I worked in an auto parts store we had a big snow in Springfield. One of my guys had an Isuzu Trooper that would go anywhere so I had him come pick me up for work. None of the other guys made it in that day and we ended up closing early but hitting the liquor store instead of going home. We were out just having a bit of fun and decided that we would stop by one of the guys house that didn't make it in to give him a hard time. As we got to his house we saw several snowmen in his yard and a little fort. He had been having all kinds of fun while we were at work. We knocked on the door buy nobody would answer. So we trashed his fort and murdered all the snowmen and then threw all out empty beer bottles out in his yard. That will teach him. As we are driving on down the road we get about 3 or 4 houses down and my buddy points at one and says "Wait a minute, isn't that Shannon's house?". He was right. 

I can honestly say, "I'm only drunk when I'm drinking."  Been there, done that.  Not with snowmen, but with other things.  Amazing how alcohol seems to affect sense of directions.

[fishinwrench]

I only got so wasted that I didn't know where I was ONCE.  Luckily I was in my own driveway.  

Never again.   I'm a professional partier, always in control.  It takes some skill to stay buzzed enough to have a great time....but sober enough to deal with just about anything that happens.    My oldest kid likes to brag about how big of a partier her and her pals are, but I remind them what amatuers they are every chance I get.    

"Oh you puked in your shoe?  No diploma for you tomorrow !"

[Johnsfolly]

We used to do a lot of other dumb stuff. However, never as much of a fail to impress like one of my fraternity brothers. When he was in high school he had a crush on a girl. To impress her he decided that he would blow up the weird kid's mailbox. That kid lived right across the street from this girl. So he put an M80 in the kid's mailbox. When it went off the explosion blew the mailbox door across the street and through the girl's front window. Regardless he never told the girl about it 😂.

[fishinwrench]

Well, Penelope has lost her pickle nose and has greenish-yellow goo oozing from her face. One of her Oreo eyes has been plucked out by a sparrow.  Her hair is wet and stringy, boobs are sagging, and she has grass sticking out of her butt crack and arm pits.  

So what have we learned here?

[Flysmallie]

5 minutes ago, fishinwrench said:

Well, Penelope has lost her pickle nose and has greenish-yellow goo oozing from her face. One of her Oreo eyes has been plucked out by a sparrow.  Her hair is wet and stringy, boobs are sagging, and she has grass sticking out of her butt crack and arm pits.  

So what have we learned here?

Global warming will kill your girlfriend?

[fishinwrench]

I have scheduled her for cosmetic surgery as soon as the kids get off the bus, but I have a feeling that as soon as they see that Orion has pissed on her leg they'll refuse to operate on her.   😟

[Ketchup]

On 1/10/2019 at 9:35 PM, fishinwrench said:

A giant apocolyptic winter storm is coming!!!!  Hope everyone is prepped and survives ok.  

Don't worry about us here, we just got a new broom so I think we'll be fine.  

Stay safe and strong everyone, and God Bless!   

Will be checking in on everyone when / if internet and phone service is restored. 

Wrench out. 🤙

Did I read that correctly? I go away for 8 months or so, and come back to see you saying “god bless”?  

[fishinwrench]

Yeah we had a "Come to Jesus" meeting while you were gone.  I ate a cracker and the whole 9.